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So So Horrified!!!! What Would You Do?

I am so dissapointed in the youth of today. How would you feel if you saw your child was one of the teens in the Sydney train station assault. I am so appalled at the state of our youngins today, I hope and pray that my son does not fall pray to the peer pressure of others. But as much as we try to instill good values in him, how can we gaurantee that he won't fall pray to peer pressure and behave poorly. I know we can't wrap him in cotton wool but god I wish we could and he's only 8yo.

any opinions and comments are more than welcome

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Permalink Reply by Etomia Wilson on March 12, 2010 at 8:48am: I have been a secondary teacher for over 10 years and have taught thousands of teenagers. Do not let the media shape your view of teenagers, for every negative story out there are many positive unreported stories. Granted some teenagers can make some very poor choices at times. The numbers of them out there making those type of violent decisions are balanced by the hundreds of lovely kids who make my job ( when I am working ) worthwhile.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Marie on March 12, 2010 at 11:08am: I felt sick when i saw the attack. I deal with this sort of thing all the time in my job but it still shocked me. What teed me off even more was the excuse of he started it first which I thought was BS. Even so it is no excuse to go a a frenzied attack it is so sad. Etomia is right we only hear the bad things in the media about youth very rarely the positive ones. I still do think that the youth of today have a different mind set to my generation of youth (aged 38 going on 39). I had a crappy upbringing but nevertheless there were clear boundaries in school and at home and I knew right from wrong.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Rebecca on March 12, 2010 at 11:40am: i think it's a mistake to blame our own children's poor behaviour on so-called "peer pressure". each individual is responsible for his or her own behaviour, and i think that using peer pressure to explain away young people's behaviour is just giving them a cop out, a way of making someone *else* responsible for their own behaviour.

and i totally agree with what the others have said - we have a "teenage werewolf" myth alive and kicking in this country. the vast majority of teenagers are decent kids who would never do anything to hurt anyone else. the media loves a beat-up, and politicians (especially conservative ones) love pointing the finger at youth and whomping up good old hysteria to take the attention away from things they don't want us to think about.

if we bring up our children with strong values, and excellent role-modelling, i believe that most of them will be just fine.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sarah on March 12, 2010 at 3:35pm: so true about the "peer pressure" thing Rebecca, I think it's like how we say oh they've fallen in with the wrong crowd, but really they are the bad crowd, they are one of them because they choose to be.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Shannon on March 12, 2010 at 2:45pm: I listened to a talk back station a couple of years ago, and a senior detective/officer who works in South Auckland was talking about how the parents react when their kids get dropped off at home after being caught on the street involved with underage prostitution and the like (also engaging in all sorts of dodgy behaviors etc) and he said that some parents were shocked and did not know the child's whereabouts, others did not really care.

I think the whole values/morals presence in families homes are directly influenced with future adolescent choices. (i'm referring to having these values weaved into family life when kids are small not when they start puberty)

You can have children that have everything given to them on a platter coming from wealthy backgrounds playing up, (i've heard loads of stories of Judges children and other "well to do" families) but where is it along the way that some parents confuse material objects/money for time?

Then you get your average income families, and low income families...the theme is all the same. Time time time. Time is not equal, it is really quality time and each child having a sense of belonging and knowing what their family stands for.

Being 'connected' with your kids are the exact words of advice this police officer used as a message to parents. Tuning in with them to check what is happening in their lives. Know who their friends are, where they live, and what they enjoy doing, and what time they'll be home etc.

Maybe it does happen that some kids turn down the wrong track even coming from a family that provided quality time, and maintained healthy relationships between both parents and children, but I don't think it is all that common. Give the kids a break and lets take a look at the childhood, the parents, and events that happened before hand and if there are things that can learned as a result.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sarah on March 12, 2010 at 3:39pm: I think we'll be just fine then. I consider myself to be very connected to my son and we talk daily about everything and anything. I walk him to and from school, but now that his new friends lives just round the corner her walks with him to school and I walk and meet him after. He has responsibilites and independence. I make sure to always keep the communication lines open between us and my door is always open to him. I have high hopes that this will continue throughout his life.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Rebecca on March 12, 2010 at 4:53pm: i think you'll be fine too :O); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Etomia Wilson on March 12, 2010 at 5:07pm: Well said Shannon exactly what I was thinking but did not have time to write. Fingers crossed for all our children!; ▶ Reply to This